CrossRoads

Sometimes I feel very insecure and scared when I think about what I want to do with my life. There are a few times when I feel like going to Auroville for good. One such instance was a few minutes ago when I was reading this article about economic development affecting nature. Well, that was mostly the head and tail of it. That is when I remembered that I even have a blog and write about it. But this is a step I am scared to take. There could be a lot of repercussions to it. Also, I am not completely sure whether this is exactly what I want or not. Guess I'll never find out unless I actually experience it myself. That is definitely not going to be a bed of roses. But maybe it is, for me.

But what if I get sick of it after a few weeks? What do I do then? Not that I can't come back. I could always come back. But it would just be another thing I failed at. So is this what it is? Am I wanting to go there to run away from my possible failures in life? Maybe so. Only to avoid the many hassles I would be running after, I choose a place where there are no hassles I could possibly after. But again, there's my trait of finding something or the other that I want and don't have. And blow it up.

So when I'm going crazy with all these questions in my head, I just switch everything off and say - Hey.. I don't have to ask myself that question. So just forget it. Rite.